Being Human
by AryaJasmine
Summary: This is a one-shot about Edward, jacob and casper living in the same house.


_**A/N I know I haven't finished my other story about the X-men but my brother had this wonderful idea and I'm thought about writing a one-shot. I started writing this but got a writer's block, so my sister finished it. I don't do much comedy and I really don't like Edward, so I totally loved her story.**_

**THE MOST UNLIKELY HOUSEMATES**

It was three weeks since the volturi tried to kill off the Cullens and two weeks since Bella left him saying the he was to clingy and crybaby for her. 'Really? Who does she think she is? She was the one in zombie mode after he left her alone.' Edward thought. Now here he was going to stay in nearby house that was considered to be haunted. He was coming here with what he considered his babysitter, Jacob. It seemed that Bella wanted some mother/daughter time with Reneesme but with Jacob around it wasn't possible and so Edward got stuck with him.

"Hurry up, leech!" Jacob said. Now that we were away from Esme and Reneesme he was very grumpy and easily irritated. 'And Bella says I'm clingy. Jacob's in a bad mood and with half a mind to kill me and get back to my daughter.' It was still something that Edward hated that Jacob had imprinted Reneesme but it was also something that had saved her life from the rest of the wolf pack.

Once inside the house out of no where a small bald ghost came out and said.

"Hi my name is Casper" He floated there waiting for them to scream and run but they both just stood staring at him and then went back to moving their stuff into the house. "You're not scared of me?"

"How can you expect anybody get scared…. By you" said Edward.

"AWWW isn't he cute" said Jacob.

Casper got mad, IM NOT CUTE! I'M ADORABLE!

"Ok, it's getting late we should go to bed"

"But I can't go to bed I'm a ghost"

"Me either" said Edward

Jacob ignored Casper and Edward and went to bed.

In the middle of the night while Jacob was sleeping Casper came to his room and woke Jacob up. Jacob woke up screaming "CAT!" and realized it was Casper.

"What do you want! Said Jacob

"Let's play a game" said Casper

"NOOOO! I'm to tired to play games go bother Edward instead"

When Casper came in to Edward's room he was reading a book, actually he read about ten books. Wow how lame is that, no wonder Bella left him.

"Hey Edward let's play a game" said Casper

"Can't you see I'm reading?"

"What are you reading?

"UUUM nothing"

"Let me see"

Casper tried to snatch the book from Edward, but Edward ran out of the room, Casper kept chasing Edward. When Edward wasn't looking he ran into the wall. Edward dropped his book; the book said "_HOW TO BE A BETTER VAMPIRE HUSBAND"_

Casper laughed and laughed and laughed until he was alive again.

"Is this all you read?" Casper asked.

"Yes" Edward said while rubbing his fore head.

"Are you reading this because you are clingy" said Casper while laughing.

Jacob came and said "what's with all the noise?"

"Edward is reading a book on how to be a better vampire husband"

"No wonder Bella left him"

"CAN YOU GUYS STOP SAYING THAT!" screamed Edward.

"Plus you can't be a good husband to save your life" said Jacob.

"YES I CAN!" said Edward.

"Oh really, one time you left her in the middle of the woods…"

Edward pouted and crossed his arms.

Casper said "Is the little baby goanna cry!" Like if he was talking to a baby. Then Edward stud up and stomped all the way to his room then came back and took his book and stomped all the way to his room again.

The next morning Edward cooked breakfast for everyone, he cooked deer with bunny blood. When Casper and Jacob saw the breakfast they both past.

"More for me" Edward said.

It was cloudy and arid outside there was no possible way to stop Edward to go outside so Casper and Jacob fallowed.

Just when Jacob got outside he screamed out "CAT!" and chased it. When Edward was walking he tripped over a vase then he got mad and threw the vase and a magic kitty came out and said "YOU HAVE TWO AND ONLY TWO WISHES THAT I WILL GRANT"

"OH MY GOD" said Edward

Edward was thinking for a minute or so then he said "I wish I knew"

The kitty said "WISH GRANTED"

Then Edward said I wish I can see Bella again.

The kitty said "WISH GRANTED" and gave Edward a picture of Bella

Edward got mad, all the sudden Jacob came and said "oh cool I wish I had a pony and a cat"

The kitty said "WISH GRANTED"

Jacob looked so happy the he mite burst, and then the kitty went back in his vase." Well at least I have a photo of Bella "said Edward, but all the sudden the picture blew away into the pond when Edward looked to the side he saw Casper blowing air out of his mouth. Edward got so mad that he started chasing Casper.

**AND THEY LIVE NEVER HAPPILY EVER AFTER.**

_**please review. My sister would love that.**_


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